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What Is Peter Pan Syndrome?

Written by Evan Bailyn on 06/20 at 12:36 PM

Peter Pan syndrome is a deep-seated belief that one will never, and must never, grow up. It is named after the legendary character of the same name who lived in Neverland, a place where kids are immune to aging.

The story of Peter Pan fascinated me as early as five years old, way before I knew what it was like to feel like an adult. I still keep an image in my mind of a particular moment in the play, when Peter Pan flew into the children’s window while they were sleeping and brought them off to Neverland. I think that scene delighted me because I, like other kids, had fears associated with sleeping - probably some combination of darkness, robbers, and dying. The act of sleeping itself is such a mystery to me even now that I can understand why my young mind would see it as fertile ground for something mystical and unknown to happen.

The very idea that one could be saved from the creepiness of sleep, from the powerless grasp of unconsciousness, was not only plausible, it was too wonderful not to believe. In that protected, naive state that characterizes children, I hazily imagined the eternal playground where Peter Pan lived, with its lush flora, children swinging on vines, parties, dancing, laughter, and complete removal from that other dimension known as everyday life.

That picture in my mind is still there. It has been weathered by the army of adults who have politely tried to tear it up with their rules and reminders about “the real world,” but the stubborn five year-old inside of me has resisted. In truth, I don’t believe that we are damned to honest Christian work ethics and middle class toil. I believe that I could be walking through the streets of New York City, turn a corner, and enter a jungle with raging rivers, sparkling waterfalls, and fairies swooping through the sky.

I am in love with childhood and with Neverland. I only wish I could find a way to bring back the vividness of that magical place that I knew best when I was five. If I could re-build Neverland exactly as I remember it, I would - anything to reclaim the hope of living forever as a child.

This is Peter Pan Syndrome. Those who don’t have it are missing something vital. After all, as Peter Pan said, “Fairies only exist if you believe in them.”

87 Comments

Posted by Sara Hodge on 06/27 at 03:18 PM

When I saw the title I said what is this???? But I know exactly what you mean by not wanting to grow up. at least not yet.! The first time I even remember Peter must have been when I was either 6 or 7 at least thats what I remember. I’m the youngest of 3 and a lot of times when I was younger and still sometimes now, I am reffered to as the ‘baby’ of the family and my adult part says Not Anymore!! but my child part just giggles and nods her head yeah! In my eyes Neverland is THE FINAL FRONTIER and its literally the ONLY place that I would what to go to when I die, just to feel the carlessness of being 6 again. Not having to worry about anything, not even if you said something wrong or goofy, and to just play for the rest of eternity.

Posted by Kai on 06/29 at 12:54 PM

I think everyone can identify with wanting to return to childhood, but im not sure if thats because it was such a magical place.

I believe memory kind of sugar-coats the actual events. If i think about events that happened only one year ago, i can see them acted out by a carefree and happy person, but i know that thats not true. it is recent enough memories that i can remember my mental states at the time, and i know that i worried, despaired and was irritated a lot more of the time than what my memory allows me to think i did.

No, i believe why we would want to return to childhood is mainly because we were far more free of responsebility, things were given to us for free and we did not have to toil for our free time.

i do believe that everyone needs to keep some part of ones child with them no matter how old you get, but what is this thing? is it your creativity, your curiosity, your imagination? or maybe its the way in which you use these things?

Posted by Taiyo on 07/04 at 10:01 AM

Agreeing with you alot here! I am still a kid at 16 I suppose but reading that and your other essays makes me think I’m definatly in this category. I spend all my time daydreaming and I have no intention of marrying or settling down, I’m set on translating japanese comics and travelling the world when I graduate. This is not a negative thing! If more adults in high places saw things with the idealisms of children we’d be living in a much happier place. For people who love this line of thought I recommend the anime Kyou Kara Maou, the typical line of travelling to alternate dimension and becoming the king, but because the main character is young and idealistic, seeing no profit in his position he strives for nothing but peace for everyone. Big kids are the best kinds of people!

Posted by Viviana on 07/04 at 01:52 PM

I came across this site wishing to broaden the concept I have of Peter Pan syndrome since I absolutely love having it. The conpcet I had focused ofcourse on those negative traits that adults want to rid themselves of.. thing is it’s just too wonderful to be a kid for ever. I have a 6 year old son and we have such a GR8 time going through forrests on expeditions, saving princesses and fighting pirates, rolling on the ground with lions and conquering parrallel universes…
You know what i used to answer when my teacher or anyone asked me what i wanted to be when i grew up… i always said A CHILD… when i grow up i wanna be A CHILD and I AM!! Well im a psychologist on the side grin

Posted by Rachel on 07/06 at 11:05 AM

I so know what you mean! I’m only 12 so my peers think Peter Pan id gay and creepy. Inside I know they still believe. Every night I wish on the second star to the right that Peter Pan is out there, and every night I hope he comes to visit me and my brother. I have no dout that Peter Pan is out there somewhere and is just hiding from all of the airplanes and new technology.

Posted by nora on 07/09 at 01:44 PM

Hi Rachel!
I think your very sweet and i would love to give you this special guiding message:
I you find a way to cope with growing up in age and fysicly, and keeping your heart like that of peter pan: you’ll be a happy “adult”!
Enjoy and treasure your childhood so you can slowly learn to cope with adult worries along the way. Just believe you can be whatever you want, and theres no limit!
Be open for why your loved ones tell you what to do, but keep in touch with your heart!
Go girl!
Nora

Posted by Rachel on 07/15 at 03:12 PM

Thanks for the advice Nora. When I thnk of all the responsibilities( i hope i spelled that right!) i shudder. All the long hours of work and all the bills!! Ugh!
One of my favorite movies is Finding Neverland with Johnny Depp and Kate Winslet. The coolest movie! I also like the 2003 movie Peter Pan starring Jeremy SUmpter and Rachel Hurd-Wood.
Right now I am reading the book Peter and the Shadow Theives. Book 2 of the series by Dave Barry and Ridely Pearson. The first book is Peter and the Starcatchers and that’s about how Pen becomes able to fly and how Tinkerbell be came a fairy! Lovely book that is a must read for Peter Pan fans!!

Posted by Rachel on 07/15 at 03:13 PM

I forgot some smileys!! grin

Posted by Rachel on 07/15 at 03:15 PM

who is the little boy on the top right corner??? Is it John? Michael? or a new boy off to see the adventures and wonders of NeverLand?? Will he forget his mum or his dad? what about his pet cat whiskers who sleeps with him every night? The world may never know the truth but I can bet he does!

Posted by WhiteFang on 07/30 at 09:15 AM

what is peter pan syndrome? I’ve wondered that for a while and reading this I’m sure that I have it. I fell in love with peter pan when we did the school play last year (I was a pirate) and have loved him ever since. I’m 13 now but (according to my friends, at least) I look 12, never want to grow up, often dream and daydream about neverland, and honestly believe in peter pan. I also draw animal cartoons in my spare time and I modelled one of the characters, a black wolf called sirius, on peter and another on captain hook. here’s to not growing up!

Posted by Rachel on 07/31 at 11:48 AM

Dear Whitefang, I think it is great that a 13 year-old still believes. I day dream and believe too! I think it is cool that you draw sirius, peter pan, and hook, i draw too. diddo to not growing up!

Posted by WhiteFang on 08/01 at 12:29 PM

Dear Rachel,
when I first saw your comment I thought to myself wow, I’ve finally found someone like myself! I truly love peter pan and I can’t believe how some people don’t. And I’m not trying to be rude, but why is it surprising that a 13-year-old still believes? But then, I guess I’m not really a typical teenager...I’m still 12 at heart!

Posted by Rachel on 08/03 at 10:39 AM

I was surprised because a lot of kids my age that go to my school think peter pan is weird so really i’m not surprised just wowed in a good way to find someone who like peter pan like me. That’s all I didn’t meen to offend you in any way.

Posted by WhiteFang on 08/04 at 10:27 AM

Hi Rachel
sorry just wondering. now I think about it I can definitly relate. who could ever call peter pan gay or weird?! it’s not fair, I know. even some of my friends think I’m a little crazy ‘cause I’ve got pictures of peter pan on my bedroom wall (it’s got NOTHING to do with jeremy sumpter, honest!) by the way, did you hear that there might be a movie of peter and the star catchers? I can’t wait till it comes out, but I have to read the book first.
you sound like a nice person. I’m starting to kinda like you.
WhiteFang

Posted by Rachel on 08/07 at 12:05 PM

i like you too. I have tons of peter pan pictures as well. Of the Disney edition, the 2003 edition, and the musicals. Every thinks I just love Jeremy Sumpter and I don’t really like peter pan but it’s the exact opposite! I think jeremy sumpter did a good job playing peter pan though don’t you?? At camp this summer i met a guy named josh and he looks just like jeremy sumpter. I imagine him in skeleton leaves and flying!!! HA! I’ve read peter and the star catchers and it is a great book. Now I’m onto peter and the shadow theives. I’m also reading Peter Pan in the Kingston Gardens and the original peter pan by J.M. Barrie.

Rachel

Posted by WhiteFang on 08/08 at 11:16 AM

Hi Rachel!
yeah, I do think jeremy sumpter was good as peter pan. I quite like the cartoon character as well...and don’t tell anyone, but I once had a crush on the guy who played peter pan in our school play! I’ve read JM Barrie’s original Peter Pan about five times. I like the way JM Barrie writes don’t you? I read in the newspaper that there’s going to be a sequel called Peter Pan in scarlet.
WhiteFang

Posted by Rachel on 08/12 at 04:04 PM

that is so cool i think the new book would be awesome! And I love the way J.M. Barrie writes too!! I won’t tell any1 about the school play! were you in it? if so what character did you play?

Posted by WhiteFang on 08/13 at 11:31 AM

Hi Rachel!
yes I was in the school play, we do 1 every year at my school (this year we’re doing Aladdin). I was a pirate, not a very big part, but my friend charlie was captain hook. it was so funny, he kept pronouncing “ale” wrong! by the way, do you want to be my pen-pal? I’m going to get an email address soon, I’ll tell you when I do. bye for now!
Whitefang

Posted by Rachel on 08/13 at 11:56 AM

yeah i would love to be your pen pal. what are some of the roles you played in the past? and are you playing a role in the aladdin play?? I was in a play called “ Who framed the big bad wolf” i was squiggy one of the three little pigs. Everyone said i stole the show. HA! my email adress is

Posted by WhiteFang on 08/14 at 09:08 AM

Hi Rachel
sorry, I don’t have an email address yet, I’ll try get it activated soon. well, in grade 4 I was part of the crowd in James and the Giant Peach, and in grade 5 I was an oompa loompa in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Really dignified huh? This year I’m a shopkeeper (groan). your play sounds cool, I know what you mean by stealing the show! have you seen the movie Hook? I watched it last night, it’s really good.
sorry - gotta go!
Whitefang wink

Posted by Christy on 08/15 at 07:07 PM

I was 2 years old when I found a love for Peter Pan. I used to have dreams when I was 4-8 that I was flying around my house. I swear that when I was seven I could jump off the stairs and put my legs back and doggy-paddle my way through the air for about 30 seconds. I used to have dreams that I was in NeverLand, it’s a recurring dream I have. I’m only 14 and I still have these dreams smile

Posted by Rachel on 08/16 at 06:33 PM

To WhiteFang: Yeah hook is a great movie! I love it! And you should be proud to be a shopkeeper, at least your in the play!

To Christy: I think it is cool you have those dreams. I have dreams where i’m with peter, john, michael, and wendy, and we’re flying over the ocean, and we ride the currents all the way to neverland. When we get there we swim with the mermaids, and fight pirates. Also I had a dream once where i was sleeping in my room, and i wake up to a boy (peter) hovering over me, just staring at me. When i got to scream ( becasue I hadn’t reconized him yet) he said Rachel don’t scream, i’m peter pan! he sat on the end of my and played his flutes for me and soon we flew out the window to neverland!!! At the end of the dream just before i would wake up peter took me back to my window and he would say, some day i’ll come for you for real Rachel,and will fly off together really, and not in some dream. Then he would kiss me lightly on the lips and fly off with tink flying in front of him. Also in one other dream i would ake up and i would be floating around the room! I would fly out of my room into the kitchen where i would eat my breakfast in the air and then go to school, when i got out of school i would say goodbye to my friends and then fly off towards home, with my brother struggling to fly behind me, becasue he couldn’t keep up with my speed and agilitly even when it was windy out. Then I would wake up and feel very light, as if i had really been flying. Please tell me more about your dreams too!!! tongue wink cheese  LOL

Posted by Evan Bailyn on 08/17 at 12:51 AM

Wow, that is an amazing dream Rachel!

Posted by WhiteFang on 08/17 at 12:29 PM

I often have dreams about Peter Pan too. one of the best ones was when I was flying over Neverland with Peter and some of my school friends. it was so vivid, I still remember exactly what Neverland looked like! in another dream I was kidnapped by Captain Hook because my brother betrayed me; I distinctly remember shouting HE BETRAYED US at the top of my voice (hopefully not in real life!) sometimes when I’m trying to get to sleep I imagine I’m sleeping in a tree with the lost boys, or flying with Peter Pan.
PS: I can definitely relate to you, Christy!

Posted by Rachel on 08/19 at 06:08 PM

hey evan bailyn, can you tell me some of your dreams???

you too whitefang, christy, and anyone else!!!

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