The Wonder Of Crushes
Having a crush is one of our original human impulses - it is the feeling of seeing in another person characteristics that compliment your being so well that you feel impelled to join their life with yours. It is a strong, passionate longing for a partnership with a person that has something you don’t have and could never possess. It is a magnetic desire for an image of beauty fetched from youth. It is a flood of emotion so mentally overwhelming that it affects your physical being.
Thinking of your crush directly causes a rush in your chest and a noticeable increase in your heartbeat. The tragedy of knowing that your crush might not reciprocate your feelings fills you with depression and hopelessness. All you can do is fantasize about your crush becoming a part of your life, of linking your experiences with theirs, of assimilating their magical existence into your mundane world.
Having a crush is a euphoric, desperate, compulsive state of being. It is truly a life-affirming experience.
I would pick the one who seems most sensible, but that’s just me.
With what heartsick and unknown has described, they have truely mentioned the many feelings that I had. I am always question how others react with crushes, and what approach others take with their crushes. There are many, many intruiging stories here and I enjoy reading the many anecdotes. It’s great to hear people share, and here’s my slice of the pie.
Though, I am still young, at the age of 18, I do not see myself capable in giving advices or creating theories and generalizations of the whole notion of crushes. However, easier said than done, it’s probably best if we act to our true personalities in front of our crushes. If your crush liked you for your smooth and silky lines, or your machoism that you pretend to be, eventually, your true personality will spoil out. Yet, when I see my crush, a blockage seems to created in my brain. I lose the sense of humor, I say very obvious statements, and sometimes make myself look like an unintelligent guy. Let alone my dumbness when I see my crush, I do not even know what my true personality is. I feel like I act differently towards different people. I can understand why I act differently in different environments(pressures with work, urban/rural locations, holiday mood), but I can’t figure out my personality since I act differently with various people.
On the other hand, talking about crushes, there is one crush recently(for the past 4-5 months, that is making me crazier than ever. Naming all the cliches, her voice is music to my ears, she’s amazing, beautiful, adorable, she being the one and so fourth, however, like many people, this recent crush is the strongest feeling I have ever had.
There are so many problems at hand though. For starters, the huge crush I have on the girl recently moved to another country to live so that I won’t be able to see her, unless holidays come around where she might return to where she lived before.
Secondly, her best friend is also one of my best friend’s, and it is only recently that I started to become very good friends with her best friends. In a way, from a outside perspective, this might be seen as me being a cheater, and trying to get close to my crush by being close to her best friend. But in reality, I truely value this friend of hers and mine, one of my closest friends. Additionally, I don’t know what I’ll feel if the impossible happens, where the crush’s feeling is reciprocated. What will the friend think? that I used her? and what will happen with the relationships with her and the friend and me and the friend?
Thirdly, similar to unknown’s situation, the crush often gives out clues, and flirts with me. Yet, there are times, where I realize that she does not care for me so much, since she never calls me. I’m always the one who takes the charge, and overcome my cowardness to call her. I used to think that I read situations well, but with other recent misreadings, my confidence has reached a new low. I have no idea how to read this girl, but i’m so desperate to find out how she feels for me.
Who isn’t afriad of rejections? It’s the fear or rejection that hinders us from finding out the truth. Everyday, and in many instances when I think about my crush, I feel like I should open up and clearly tell her my feelings for her. But I had a friend who also had a crush on the same girl, while they used to be really close friends, when he opened up and told him how he felt about her, their friendship either came on a hiatus, or simply, it’s turned upside down. I’m afraid of the same situation if I ever told her how she feels, yet, I want to embrace her in my life.
Yes, I also agree that this crush is someone that i feel unobtainable at times. I feel as though she’s superior in many ways; her intelect, her social skills and her everything is superior to me.
Everyday, I consider when I should open up and tell her how I feel, and everyday, my fear binds me to a lonley tree of sadness, where I just dream and scream at her. Obviously not applicable to those who are married, but are the chances worth taking to tell the opposite your deep true blue feelings? If rejection comes a long, I can imagine myself having a forever, if not, a long term shattered heart because my feelings for her are just that strong.
Quoting from a song, “Dice” by Finley Quay, should I “roll the dice and swear that [I love you]"(good song btw). Or is it too big of a sacrifice if rejection comes a long, where my heart will shatter? A decision like this,(maybe exagerrated), will change my life forever, yet, its pending on a final decision everyday. Or should I just keep those lingering thoughts to my heart?
WAYYY too long. I’m sorry folks. I just had to spurt it out, pretending that people will actually reply, or listen. It’s probably a very simple situation, like many cases, when a situation occurs on onself, it’s impossible to diagnose.Thanks for the patience.